*Listen up ladies because this is important*
So, naïve me was at REI the other day (actually the day I wore this outfit) and I realized the man helping me find new hiking shoes was flirting but I didn’t think much of it because he was an employee and we would never see each other again. Somehow we got in a situation where he had his phone right in front of me asking for my number and I was very taken aback, and he was very forward about his interest in me, and not knowing what to do I gave it to him. Probably not the best decision I’ve ever made, and I knew he wasn’t the type of man I am looking for, but he was a nice guy and respectable and I felt guilty saying no.
That was my mistake.
The worst part of it was that when we were talking earlier I let on that I was going to the beach and he quickly invited himself, got off work, and sent me the address of where we could meet. To say I was anxious was an understatement and I didn’t understand why. I kept reasoning that this is what people do in the adult world; you see someone you are attracted to, ask them on a date, and see if there is any chemistry. No matter what I told myself I was still anxious, so I called my mom. Right away she thanked me for calling her and told me to trust my gut. My mom has always been a huge supporter of the idea that our gut is just another way for God to quickly tell us when something is going right or wrong but it’s like a muscle that we have to work on. If you don’t practice listening to it, it won’t work as well and you will not trust it.
So, I called him, felt guilty as heck and definitely made something up, and canceled the ‘date.’ At first, I didn’t feel relief. To be honest with you I questioned it 20 times and thought way too much about it and was filled with guilt. Then I went to the beach that I was planning on going to earlier by myself…
I was literally the only one on the beach so I took my shoes off, held up my dress, and ran into the water. It was absolutely beautiful. As the sun set I stood in the water and shouted worship music at the top of my lungs with no fear and I felt so at peace. I realized that this peace was God’s way of thanking me for listening to Him, for trusting Him. See, I have been struggling with the whole single thing. I’ve got to be honest with you guys, it’s been very hard for me as my friends randomly started dating people at the same time and God kept me single as could be. So, when a boy asked me on a date and told me I was beautiful, even though I could feel it was wrong, I doubted my gut and was just excited to be pursued. I figured he was a nice guy and it was wrong of me to turn him down just because he wasn’t my type.
WE DO NOT HAVE TO FEEL GUILTY FOR TURNING A BOY DOWN IF WE ARE UNCOMFORTABLE. I mean we have been made to feel guilty for it since we were young; we are told never to tell a boy no at a dance, to always give him a chance, to just be nice. Normally I would agree with this, but when we feel uncomfortable or unsure of the situation we just say yes out of guilt instead of following our gut and that is wrong for both parties. I knew in my heart of hearts that God did not want me to pursue this man in any way yet I convinced myself that I was being judgmental and mean if I didn’t give him a chance. That is so wrong. My gut was right; I felt anxious and it all happened so fast and I was not comfortable with being alone with him.
I just want every girl reading this post to know the peace I felt when trusting my gut and not pursuing this relationship. Instead of feeling pathetically single like I normally did, I actually felt God affirming me even more in my vocation to marriage and motherhood. It was so amazing and my heart was so full. I can’t stress how much trusting in God’s plan for you, trusting in the gut feelings He has given you, is because the fruits that come from it are so beautiful and so real.
On a totally other note, I absolutely loved this outfit I put together and it was really all thanks to the shoes and guess where I got them… Target! I found them last week and fell in love with them. They are just bold enough to complete any simple outfit but do not overpower an outfit that is already cute by itself. They are a wardrobe staple and I honestly felt more confident just walking around in these bad boys. They are my new favorite shoes and go perfectly with my new army green swing dress from old navy.