A Heart that Loves with Reckless Abandon

Brigid Kilner was the answer to so many prayers this last year. First, it was, ‘Jesus I just want someone who understands my faith and truly runs towards you with.’ Then it was, ‘please Jesus I really want to stop tearing other women down’ and He sent Brigid to inspire me. Then it was, ‘Jesus I feel like I need to be everything to everyone’ and He sent Brigid to be one of the few friends who I can just Be with. Brigid Kilner is an answered prayer in every single way. She is wise beyond her years and has honestly impressed me so much. In these last few months of knowing her, she has quickly become one of my greatest friends and understands my heart better than most people I’ve known my whole life.

A social work major with an overwhelmingly maternal heart, this girl knows how to love and she does that by emulating the love of her true Father, “I think human beings are most empowered by the knowledge that we are loved, and who loves us better than our Father. If we look at ourselves through the eyes of God we can realize our own goodness as His beloved, and we are encouraged to use the gifts he has given us to love his people.” For Brigid, it’s when giving of herself that she finds herself and that is truly something to behold. “He has given me this heart to serve and this heart that loves with an absolute reckless abandon that can be pretty overwhelming at times, and he wants me to use it to love his children and draw people closer to Him. I am called to give my heart to Him and to allow Him to use me as a channel of his peace, his love, and his passion.”brigid (4 of 6)In John Paul II’s Theology of the Body he speaks of ‘all is gift,’ which is this idea that all of creation is a gift to man (a gift that Adam + Eve took for granted) and we must be living every single day as a gift if we wish to align our hearts back to His, “I have found that the best way to let Him into my life, even when I’m struggling, is through gratitude. If I am aware of the little moments and gifts that He gives me through the people and things around me, like the laughter of a friend or the beauty of a sunset, then I can really start to live my life with Him.” Living in gratitude of our Creator is in our very nature and once we live into that then God can radically start acting in your life, “Through my gratitude, it begins to feel so natural to invite Him into all of the aspects of life, and I see a freedom in the way I pray and in the way I encounter others – so open to whatever they may bring to me because I know that I am greeting them with Christ.”

brigid (3 of 6)

I have spoken a lot on this blog about our desperate need for a community of women in each one of our lives. We all need women to hold us up, call us out, and love us beyond all our faults. We all need a woman who is recklessly running towards Christ without abandon. Maybe you’re that person for your friends, maybe you know who that is in your life or maybe you haven’t quite found her yet. I waited a long time to have that woman in my life and that woman is Brigid, “While my softness is in so many ways my strength when it comes to loving people, I see that my wildness draws people into the home of my heart as well. There is an incredible power in the fact that the feminine heart knows no bounds when it is nurtured by the love of Christ.”

One of my favorite aspects of Brigid is the way that she loves women so so much. She is so focused on ridding her life of comparison and envy with other women and simply loving them and that has inspired me like you couldn’t imagine. What I think is interesting is how this loving view of women has affected her view on modesty, “I really have grown to dislike the word modest because of the negative connotations of hiding and shame that have developed as part of the culture of modesty. Women are so so beautiful and it is good for their beauty to be seen and appreciated – as anything beautiful is glorifying God.”

We are reducing our feminine power to something that is purely physical, not something that is highly intellectual, spiritual, and emotional.

So, how does she dress in a way that glorifies her Creator? “When I dress, I, of course, want to look beautiful, but in a way that invites people into conversation with me, in a way that intrigues. When we use our bodies instead to entice or manipulate, we are doing a great injustice to ourselves and the people around us by eliminating an entire level of human connection. We are reducing our feminine power to something that is purely physical, not something that is highly intellectual, spiritual, and emotional.” brigid (1 of 6)I pray that everyone has someone like Brigid in their lives as an example of a woman who is wild and free and running towards Christ with everything she has. If you haven’t found that woman yet, pray unceasingly and be willing to wait because after 4 years of praying for her God has finally answered that prayer.