Living Out Femininity with a Confident Closet

Oh, ladies – first off, hello on a Saturday morning! Don’t quite know how I feel about posting today but, hey, you gotta do what you gotta do. Secondly, I went to the coolest talk last Sunday by two women who were just so kick butt and doing awesome things for God. The first was Megan Mccleneghen and she is leading college students, especially women, closer to Christ every single day. The other was Nicole M. Caruso, once Armani worker turned Verily beauty editor turned stay at home mom & make-up artist. When I say that these were some phenomenal women I meant it. The purpose of this talk was for them to speak on everything from the fashion industry to their thoughts on beauty, faith, and femininity – aka my favorite things to talk about – so you better believe that I took notes and I can’t wait to share them with you!

I will go into the fashion side of the talk in a little bit but I really wanted to focus on how they spoke of femininity. One of them said, “The woman’s soul is supposed to be a haven of life and a light for others.” Woah, that’s a big one to process. What she meant by this was, on a physical level we were made to create and carry life within us, but it goes so much deeper into who we were created to be. As women, we have this life-giving gift. This ability to bring people into our hearts and make them feel like home. Maybe it doesn’t always feel like this (especially when we feel grimy some days or just plain out socially awkward on others) but in some way or another this gift has been placed onto your soul and to embrace this aspect of you is to embrace your femininity. There are things that will not exist in this world if you do not live in your femininity.  Femininity looks different in every single solitary woman, and sometimes that’s hard to remember when you’re comparing yourself to other amazing Catholic women around you, but it is so so so important to take the time to pray and ask God how He intends to use your femininity for the Kingdom of Heaven.fashio (2 of 3)The second thing these women really stressed with the need for intentionality in your life. We need to find out how to live intentionally in our lives in our walk with Christ. Whether it be starting our your day simply talking to Jesus as you’re drinking your coffee, spending 20 minutes of silence at some point in your day, or starting the rhythm of daily mass it is so essential for each and every one of us to dedicate a specific time for Jesus every single day. I told you earlier that we must ask God how He intends to use our femininity and I’m sure some of you, because this is still me sometimes, were like – okay, Jesus, doesn’t really talk to me like that and I never quite get a clear answer like that in prayer. This may be true right now, heck the sheer mass of times I’ve been in desolation in the last 4 months have been insane, but I guarantee you that once you set up a routine prayer with Him you will start to see more clearly where and how He is leading you. I’m not saying at first the prayer won’t seem dry and awkward and you might feel like your speaking and He isn’t saying anything back but keep going – I promise that He will reveal Himself to you if you seek Him out. Our God is a gentleman and He will not push Himself on you unless you give Him permission.

Once you spend this time with Jesus He will slowly start revealing to you who you are and once that happens there isn’t just a spiritual change that takes place but a physical one too. Our interior beauty is inseparable from our exterior beauty just as our soul is inseparable from our bodies. For Nicole, “Having a personal style is getting to the core of who you are and what message you are walking around telling others.” The fashion world is so often telling women that we have to dress in a certain way if we want to be seen as stylish but that is the greatest lie brought to you by the consumerist culture. Yes, we can use the style of others as inspiration (I do it all the time!) but to dress like someone else is to deny an aspect of yourself. And when we start to dress like someone else it allows insecurities to enter into our minds. When we try to be someone else then we start comparing ourselves to that person. Soon our bodies, our clothing, our personalities are just not good enough. Everyone has had that moment when you’re wearing something that doesn’t feel right and it almost feels like the outfit is wearing you and not the other way around.fashio (1 of 3)So much of what they talked about was how intentional living allows you to live in the present moment and that translates to our clothing. When we’re comfortable then we are confident and when we don’t have to focus on our clothing then we can be present to the job at hand. I think we all have those outfits in our closet that are your, “confident outfits;” the outfits that you just feel like yourself in, you aren’t fidgeting with it all day, and you just feel yourself reaching for whenever you have a big thing that day. Here is the thing sisters, our whole closet should be filled with confidence outfits. We need to be more intentional about our shopping habits and stop just buying a random shirt at target just because it’s cute at the time and cheap. We deserve better than a closet full of clothing that doesn’t make us feel beautiful

Here are some quick tips for making a confident closet:

  • Look at the confident outfits that you do have and look for a pattern in them (it’s okay to feel pretty in your clothing)
  • Look at things like Pinterest to see what speaks to you and what you would actually like to wear
  • Start making a list of things you want to buy on your phone and don’t buy anything not on that list unless you absolutely love it. By removing impulse shopping you will create a more intentional closet that you absolutely love.
  • Shop through your current closet and if you wouldn’t buy something that you have in your closet today if you haven’t worn it in a while, or it just doesn’t fit right then get rid of it

Here is to living intentionally and confidently as women of God!